Asking For A Friend with TalkDoc

#032: Leading Questions - How to Ask Neutral Questions

“Did you have a good day at school?” 

“Did you like the service we provided you tonight?”

“Weren’t you sick on Tuesday?”

All of us have encountered questions like these - framed to lead us to answer in a specific manner. 

In this episode of “Asking For A Friend," Dr. Pamela Kreiser, aka TalkDoc, will help you identify the 4 types of leading questions.  Co-hosts, Teighlor and Meredith join TalkDoc for a conversation about the danger of responding as-is to these “question traps” and how to re-frame the questions to elicit  answers that build rather than control dialogue for healthier relationships with others.

Check out our new website:  AFAFpodcast.com

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#031: Shhhhhhh: How to Manage Silence

From time to time we all experience silent moments during our conversations. How we utilize and respond to the quiet spaces between what we are saying to each other can either nurture or decelerate the progression of our everyday relationships. 

In this episode of “Asking For A Friend,” TalkDoc explores silence as a space for something new to happen.  You’ll learn how to manage the awkwardness and tension that silence can create to improve the quality of your interactions with others.  Meredith and Teighlor join TalkDoc to discuss silence from a variety of perspectives and provide practical advice on managing silence. 

 

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#030: AFAF with Jason Harper on How To Resolve Conflict

Are you experiencing conflict in a close, personal relationship?  Are you searching for ways to overcome communication roadblocks in order to bring your relationships to a new and better place?
 
In this episode of “Asking For A Friend,” join TalkDoc, Meredith and Teighlor as they interview Jason Harper, mediation expert and conflict coach.  Jason brings his wealth of credentials and experience to the conversation offering practical insights to better work through conflicts and find resolution. 
 
Jason shares his unlikely path and winding road through his legal and corporate experience and what it has taught him - there is no such thing as conflict prevention. He shares valuable lessons he’s learned on the way including the most helpful process steps to conflict resolution, how healing in community can overcome suffering in isolation, and the power of listening for unmet needs.

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#029: The Dance of Visibility (Part 3): Strategic Alignment - How to be a Better Communicator

In this episode, TalkDoc guides us through part 3 of the “Dance of Visibility." Wouldn’t it be great if there was a do over in conversation until we are satisfied with the results? Whether this be missed opportunities to speak or wishing you could delete an interaction altogether, learning to be strategic is a key element in this dance. It can be tempting to dump all responsibility on one person, but communication is a joint activity. This “dance” involves others and true competence is adaptive to the other. But what makes someone competent? TalkDoc challenges competence to be a joint activity not a one person blame game. This week, listen for TalkDoc’s 3 areas to improve your dance: select your communication behaviors, maintain image and goals for self and others. Remember each situation holds different demands; one communication tool may not work in every room. Ask yourself if you are adapting to help self and others become more visible. The challenge is to let go of the idea that a perfect set of skills will be the answer. So find your skill set and figure out what you want to accomplish. The goal of strategic alignment is coordination, adaptability and a space where authentic communication can happen. Let us know what you think: hello@afafpodcast.com

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#028: The Dance of Visibility (Part 2): How to Stop Over Explaining!

In this episode, we tackle Part 2 of the “Dance of Visibility” discussing ways to reduce over explaining and over justifying our messages. Are you someone who finds yourself in moments of over explaining? This week is about the part of the dance where we speak up too much then regret the interaction altogether. TalkDoc challenges our emotion of worry in these moments. Perhaps you worry about others’ negative perceptions of you or worry about not belonging. Research show us four ways people confuse messages by repeating, false starts, filled pauses and unfilled pauses. These misfires confuse the listener. Strategies to combat these misfires, begin yet again with getting to know ourselves better, doing more planning instead of clean up and giving yourself permission to be bold. Those in powerful positions have greater responsibility to create spaces to reduce confusion and promote clarity.

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#027: The Dance of Visibility (Part 1): How to Speak Up!

In this episode, TalkDoc begins our 3 part series, “The Dance of Visibility” with the effects of not speaking up, the consequences silence can have within ourselves and the world around us. Even a Supreme Court justice has admitted to electing not to speak up when she wanted to. So if you don't speak up, you’re not alone! When we don’t speak up when we want to, we lose alignment within ourselves - it’s the tinge of regret we’ve all felt before. But the cost can be so great! So how do we lean into correct the alignment? Start to notice where you feel regret inside yourself when you don’t speak up. Listen to that voice and learn with us! One of the key lessons this week is to consider positions of power (leaders, parents, teacher etc.) and start creating safer spaces where authentic communication can happen. Keep in mind the strategies and share with us your questions and experiences at: @hello@afafpodcast.com

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#026: Perception Checking - How to Get People to Talk

Have you ever had a conversation go no-where or just end because of a short response? Do you get frustrated with these type of non responses? In this episode, TalkDoc and the team explain the 3-part format of perception checks using practical everyday examples. These 3 part perception checks help us move through frustrating conversations and find clarity in our interactions. As you develop these tools remember practicing them in advance is vital to relationship success. Consider making your TC4G for this week keeping your words and non-verbal expressions aligned. Be wary of a perception check followed by a baised facial expression and remember, having a plan to avoid placing another in a defensive position creates opportunities for growth. Growth is what we are here for on AFAF! Tell us the neutral responses you are practicing: @hello@afafpodcast.com

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#025: Bloopers Reel 2 – Reaching farther…further

As we celebrate our 6 Month-A-Versary, we continue to grow our podcast further…farther! Listen to TalkDoc, Teighlor and Meredith’s latest blooper reel to hear more of our uncoordinated moments. Special thanks to our listeners who have supported our first six months of podcasting in spite of our imperfections. Thank you listening to Asking For A Friend with Talkdoc!

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#024: AFAF with Staci Ross on How to Manage Gaslighting (PART 2)

In this episode (part 2), Staci Ross, M.A., L.M.F.T. is our guide for how a targeted person of gaslighting can see the warning signs and find freedom. Staci relates healing from gaslighting as similar to healing from grief. While the loss of an unhealthy relationship is good for us, we still acknowledge the process of loss and healing work that’s needed. For example, have you ever felt pity for someone that hurts you? Join us as we pick Staci’s brain for advice on discerning gaslighting and manipulative traits. Lean in as Staci gets beautifully brave and vulnerable with us.  She invites us into her own experiences illustrating what it’s like to be in relationship with someone who gaslights. Not surprising, our own healthy boundaries help us in dealing with these traits (see previous episodes on boundaries). We are so thankful for Staci’s time and words of wisdom this week! We hope to hear from you (hello@afafpodcast.com).

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#023: AFAF with Staci Ross on How to Identify Gaslighting (PART 1)

In this episode (part one), Staci Ross, M.A., L.M.F.T., of over 20 years, holistic health coach and Reiki master answers questions and walks us through what gaslighting and manipulation really are. We hear these terms thrown around often and wonder if we use them accurately. Staci eloquently guides us to better understand these serious traits. As you listen, remember gaslighting comes in phases: disbelief, defense and depression. There’s a difference between being manipulative and a person who is gaslighting. Gaslighting is the extreme action of a manipulator. It is systemic, an intentional attempt to break down another over time.  A person who gaslights chips away at our support systems; they breed isolation. Staci’s years of wisdom both personally and professionally on these topics give us a foundation for the “what” on these massive areas. Check out our next episode (part 2) about solutions, examples, and how to discern these behaviors in our own lives. 

 

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